Repair
Cooling a conflict down and putting a relationship back together after it.
Where it sits
Repair is one of five facets, and it covers handling others. The five are arranged along two lines: reading versus handling, and yourself versus other people. The territory as a whole is mapped at what emotional intelligence is.
It is measured by 8 items in the questionnaire, five keyed positively and three reversed. The full method is here.
What a high score looks like
You can lower the temperature and go back to someone afterwards, so disagreements stay survivable.
What a low score looks like
Conflict tends to either escalate or go quiet, and quiet is usually the thing that lasts.
Low here is not a character verdict. It describes what tends to happen, and it is the part of the profile most worth working on, which is why the practical recommendations start from the two lowest facets rather than the highest.
The part nobody tells you
Being the one who repairs things means you may be absorbing costs nobody is asking you to absorb.
Every facet has a cost at the top end as well as the bottom. A report that only describes strengths as good is describing a person who does not exist.
What this facet cannot tell you
It is a self-report figure, so it measures how you see yourself on repair, which is useful and is not the same as how you come across. It carries a margin of about 9 points either way, so a small difference between two facets is not a difference at all. And it is not clinical: it cannot identify a condition and must not be used to decide anyone’s job, place or care.
The other four
- Self-Insight: noticing, naming and tracing your own emotions.
- Composure: staying functional under emotional load, and how quickly you recover.
- Attunement: reading other people accurately from words, tone and behaviour.
- Drive: using emotion to get yourself moving, and keeping it out of decisions where it does not belong.
Find out how you read a room, and how you handle one.
54 questions, about 12 minutes. Free to take, and your band is free to see.
Take the EQ test